The life I resume when I go back...

Is quite a hell to go back to.  As much as I love college, there are times when it just sucks ass.  It's a long story, but I have time...and space to fill.  First, I have 20 credit hours next semester.  Never, ever do that in your whole entire life.  Why?  You won't have one.  A life that is.  It will be slowly sucked out and you'll become sort of like a ghost, just going through the motions and somehow staying alive.  Secondly, my classes aren't all that great.  I have an art history class, 4 studio classes (including my voice studio), a musicianship class, and TWO chorus classes instead of one.  That really sucks on Mondays.  Third, I have the boy problem.  The ever freaking present boy problem.  I do, however, have one option.  I have to let the boy have his space.

Now, it's time for the boy story.  Ryan.  Ryan Mann.  Quiet guy who stays in the back of the room learning and doesn't say one single word.  Really doesn't say a word.  He's a country boy at heart with the boots, hat, and plaid to go with it.  Still, he's sarcastic, funny, and cute.  Yes, cute.  However, me and him.  Woah!  Sort of scary that.  Anyway, since I'm hyperactive and he's not, the world ended up in a personality clash.  People got hurt, friendship disintegrated, and well, now I'm back at square one.  Except the ball's in his court.  I have no control.  That's what I hate.

Still, I'll live.  Maybe school will serve as the distraction.  Maybe not.  I'll find a way.

Lots of love to y'all.

Wow...it's been quite a long time.

Currently Listening Two Horizons By Moya Brennan see related

All I can say is HOLY CRAP!  So much stuff has happened!  It's been almost two months and I'm sure almost none of you have heard even a peep from me!  I hope that I'll update you all on this crazy life I lead and all the stuff that's been going on...I'll tell you, it's insane.  One whole long string of drama. 

August:  Hmm...let's start from the beginning of school, since that was a LONG time ago.  I didn't do much the first few weeks, except get choir as a educational option because of the period it was in.

September:  My boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me.  I started getting overwhelmed with school.  I usually stayed up late doing homework and chatting with my friends.  We had conversations about "lucky tampons, Christcicles, and communion wine."  Other than that, not much happened...

October:  This was the month from hell.  It has not only been a bad month, but a bad month for everything!  I've fallen for my pastor's son, I'm living out my school life as my social life, and going back to being a freaking outcast.  Other than that, I'm going to ATF really soon!  First time ever!  I'm so excited!  Anyway, about this PK thing.

I cannot believe it.  It was horror ON ICE!  Ayesha was mad at Sam for taking her "boyfriend" to homecoming and then "stealing" him from her.  Stephen (PK) totally tried to keep them from killing each other 24/7.  Well, he started liking Ayesha...and started "stalking" her.  She got pissed and totally freaked out at me about it...and this was after they had gone to homecoming together.  

So...I actually like him...and Ayesha screamed in my face one day that "YOU can HAVE him" in the cafeteria...How embarrassing...  So, my friends proceeded to write a note for him that said the same.  Well, obviously this note was transferred to his hands...and guess what?  He READ IT!!!  God, that sucked.  He came up to me in choir the next day and said, "I got this really weird note...let's forget that ever happened."  I thought, ok, I can't forget, but I guess I can try... 

Well, the very next day, I went to chess...well, he was also there!  GOD!!! I can't get rid of him.  He was drawing...and I was revising my essay (of course none of us playing chess!)...and we just sort of sat there.  We both looked at each other at the same time...and I guess we just...I don't know how to explain it...needless to say, I sat down next to him...and I guess we could stand each other.  At one point, he took his headphones off and let me listen...I was sort of shocked (because he ended up touching my ear, but there was no preventing that.  x_x).  We started talking...

And I guess now we're friends.  I don't know how "much" of friends we are, but at least we talk.  That's good.  We're both going to ATF, so that might affect something for the good...or bad. 

Now:  I guess I'll update more, if I get the time!  I have to go now...since I have homework, but SOMEONE PLEASE SEND ME COMMENTS SO YOU KNOW I'M STILL ALIVE!  I think that was big enough...

See you all sometime later!

This summer has been so shitty!  I've not updated in freaking forever because I've had no time, or have been doing other things.  So, my mom's got to have a heart cath, I'm applying for a fast food job, and the life I had went down the porcelain toilet long ago.  Big surprise that I get headaches every freaking day.

Well, since I haven't updated, there really isn't much to say.  School starts in a week and a half (oh joy!), I quit tennis, and all whole bunch of other crap I don't feel like writing about now.  So, for now, bye!

Well, my day was OK.  It could have been better, but it also could've been a lot worse, so I'm taking it positive today.  My boyfriend and I went on a "date."  *shock, gasp, faint*  We had coffee at the little cafe in town and then went to the park and talked for a few hours, ended up looking at each other's underwear (totally on accident!  Not involving the oh-so-secret three-letter word!), and having a grand old time.  I didn't have to deal with crap from my dad (although I have to clean another part of the freakin' house tomorrow!), coughing and "maid service" from my mom, or just random "Don't touch me's" from my sister.  Just a little rest, relaxation, and conversation.  It was so enjoyable. 

Then I got home and the world went to hell, but hey, that was expected, wasn't it?  Dam*, I hate when I'm right.  It just makes the whole day a pile of shi*, doesn't it?  Of course it does.  This is it from me now, more in a few days probably, unless something big happens.  Nope, don't think so.

Somebody comment on this stupid retarded life that I lead!  It SUCKS!